How to Annoy the Cenobites
by KahnShao
Summary: Kirsty is bored so she finds out ways to annoy the cenobites. What will they do when their patience wears out?
1. Chapter 1

**How To Annoy the Cenobites**

**(and other residents)**

**Kirsty Cotton had found it amazingly easy to annoy the cenobites in the labyrinth. She particularly loved to annoy Pinhead. For the simple reason as he was always so calm and collected. She wanted to annoy them all just to see how far she could go before they totally lost it and chased after her. **

**What could they honestly do to her now? Technically she was a resident of the labyrinth now and currently there was nothing much else to do other than visit other people's personal hells and see what was up. It got boring after a while. Kirsty wandered around a bit wondering to herself on how she could annoy Pinhead. 'I have about 50 ways to totally annoy Pinhead. I wanna see what will make him go over the edge.' she thought to herself with a wicked grin. **

**Laughing to herself she set out to find the Leader of the Cenobites Xipe Totec. She found the cenobite standing off by himself staring towards the sky in silent prayer to the Lord Of The Labyrinth; Leviathan. Wisely she waited until he was done communing with the gigantic spinning diamond before putting her plan into motion.**

**Sorry this chapter is a tad short.**

**Next chapter Kirsty finds ways to annoy Pinhead.**


	2. ways to annoy pinhead

**Ways To Annoy Pinhead**

**Kirsty carefully approached her Master and boldly stared into his eyes. He looked back at Kirsty curiously and started to wonder what the strange woman was up to. This is how she started in on the poor cenobite:**

**50) Asked him where he got his pins and if they hurt**

**49) Called him Gridface repeatedly**

**48) Asked him if he wore white make up**

**47) Asked him when and if he brushed his yellow teeth**

**46) Asked if he was on drugs or if his eyes were normal like that**

**45) Asked why he was wearing a skirt if he was a guy**

**By now Pinhead was just curious. He listened to her rambling questions patiently knowing she would soon run out of steam and get bored.**

**44) Asked if she could use one of his nails to build a house**

**43) Asked if a pin fell out would his head deflate**

**42) Asked if a pin fell out did he have everyone help find it**

**41) Asked about his hooks in his fingers**

**40) Asked if he was emo because his finger nails were black**

"**Kirsty"…Pinhead warned. He was slightly getting irritated but still stayed. He wanted to see exactly where she was going with this. Kirsty giggled like a mad woman which started to scare Pinhead to be honest.**

**39) Said that Angelique was having Butterball's baby**

**38) Said that Chatterer had a crush on him**

**37) Told Pinhead his grid marks were uneven**

**36) Told Pinhead he had a booger in his nose**

**35) Gave Pinhead a wet willie**

**34) Told Pinhead Butterball thinks he's hot**

**33) Took Pinhead's knives and replaced them with toys**

**32) Tangled all of Pinheads hooks and chains**

**31) Took out half of Pinheads pins and hid them**

**30) Asked if he **_**really**_** loved Angelique or was playing**

**Pinhead stared at Kirsty. His eyes coal black his face rigid with anger. It took all of his will power not to grab Kirsty and toss her in the nearest dumpster. If he walked off now he'd be the laughing stock of Hell.**

**29) Asked if Pinhead still slept with his "boo bear"**

**28) Asked if there was something going on with Female**

**27) Asked why he kept fingering the lament configuration**

**26) Asked him if he ever changed his clothes**

**25) Asked if he knew Elliott Spencer**

**24) Asked if someone hit Elliott would he feel it**

**23) Asked why he walks so slow and never runs**

**22) Asked why he calls everyone child**

"**Kirsty I'm warning you…" Pinhead gritted his teeth making sure no one was around. Kirsty merely shrieked laughter that sounded like a cross between a hyena and horny monkey.**

**21) Asked if he was still with Merkova**

**20) Asked if he ever got "lucky" with Merkova**

**19) Asked if he ever even had sex once he got transformed**

**18) Wondered why smoke came out of his mouth when he talks**

**17) Asked if his daddy ever loved him and hugged him**

**Kirsty was having so much fun that she didn't notice that Pinhead had summoned a dumpster right behind her and that it was open. Pinhead didn't say a word just merely stared trying to remain calm. If he acted out then everyone would know he could be pushed into action and they would all be looking to see how much they could pull.**

**16) Noticed the dumpster smell and asked if Pinhead farted**

**15) Asked if he soiled himself**

**14) Asked if he fathered a child in the Labyrinth before**

**13) Wondered if he would date someone like Female**

**12) Told him that Merkova was dating Frank Cotton**

**11) Told him he was the father of HER (Kirsty's) child**

**10) Asked why he gritted his teeth when he was talking to her**

**09) Told him Merkova was pregnant and he was NOT the father**

**08) Told him Elliott Spencer needed space**

**07) Tried to see what was under the Cassock**

**Kirsty cackled maniacally. She was winning. Pinhead was starting to loose his cool as he could see him starting to twitch.**

**06) Asked why he was twitching or if he was just on drugs**

**05) Asked him if he'd kiss Chatterer on a dare**

**04) Went to tickle him under his armpits**

**03) Asked if he had any pins in his nether regions**

**02) Asked why he was so serious**

**01) Called him Pinny Winny Head**

**The next thing Kirsty knew she was sailing head first into the dumpster behind her. She heard Pinhead cursing loudly as he left the area away from her. Kirsty got out of the dumpster giggling. "I got him…I got him." She sang to herself**

**Poor Pinhead. Next Chapter Kirsty annoys Female. How will she handle it.**


	3. How to annoy female

_**How To Annoy Female**_

_**Kirsty had removed herself from the dumpster Pinhead had placed her in…or threw her in to be honest. Dusting herself off she wandered around in search of Nikoletta; otherwise known as Female. Female was the probably the most quiet one out of the bunch so annoying her would be fun.**_

_**Kirsty had found Female walking around by herself. She quickly approached the female cenobite smiling. Female looked at her warily. "Kirsty," she nodded in greeting. "You smell foul. What were you doing?" Female asked preferring not to know the answer. Kirsty merely shrugged still grinning. There was an awkward silence between the two before Kirsty started in on her second target.**_

_**50) Asked Female why she shaved her head**_

_**49) Asked if she had to keep doing it or if it was a permanent job**_

_**48) Asked if she used Nair Hair remover**_

_**47) Offered to wax her bald head for her**_

_**46) Asked if she got good reception with the wires she has**_

_**45) Asked if she ever got a sore throat**_

_**44) Asked if she shaved her armpits or were they done already**_

_**43) Tell her Chatterer wasn't into girls**_

_**Female having less patience than Pinhead gave Kirsty a slight shove. If it were possible she would have been blushing. "I suggest you quit it Kirsty. I do not possess the patience that Pinhead has." Kirsty still giggled. It seemed as if she had a death wish.**_

_**42) Tell her Angelique is her replacement**_

_**41) Tell her Angelique is way more prettier than her**_

_**40) Tickle her nose nail thing**_

_**39) Say that Pinhead no longer wants to be with her**_

_**38) Call her Cue-Ball**_

_**Female's eyes narrowed and she stalked towards her holding her sickle and filleting knife in hand. She was getting irritated and was determined to get Kirsty to quit this harassment once and for all.**_

_**37) Ask her if she was **__**really **_**a nun**

**36) Ask her if she ever had to go in a confessional booth**

**35) Ask why she has a man's voice and its whispery**

**34) Tell her to speak up when she speaks**

**33) Run and give her a big kiss on her lips**

**32) Tell her Channard likes her.**

**31) Tell her the tests came back and she's pregnant**

**Kirsty had began to start backing away. Female was advancing on her with deadly intent. She stopped and threw her blade at Kirsty's head. Luckily Kirsty ducked and it slammed into the back of Pinhead. "Owww…Female you dumbass!" Pinhead yelled.**

**30) Ask her where her eyebrows went**

**29) Tell her Pinhead was going to propose but decided not to**

**28) See if she's ticklish on her belly**

**27) Tell her she has a big head**

**26) Offer to take her to a hair regrowth clinic**

**25) Say that butterball has a thing for her**

**24) Tell her she's ugly**

**23) Take away her prized weapons and toss them out**

**22) Tell her when she screams she sounds like a dude**

"**Kirsty. Listen very carefully; I. will. Fucking. Kill. You. Do you understand me?" Female snarled. Kirsty grinned laughing. "You can't do shit you bald headed rogane using wannabe." **

**21) Asked if Female was **_**really **_**a virgin before she got changed**

**20) Asked if she still was a virgin**

**19) Asked why she was so cold and heartless**

**18) Asked if the reason was, was denied love**

**17) Ask why she got off touching her throat**

**16) Asked if it hurt sometimes**

**15) Told her Tiffany thought she was stupid**

**14) Banish her to the human realm to be with little kids**

**13) Asked if she liked children**

**12) Asked if she wanted kids one day**

**By now Female was beyond pissed. She stood there clearly livid. Too angry to even move after her.**

**11) Asked if she pooped**

**10) Asked who her crush was/is then go tell that crush**

**09) Asked if she likes girls because she's always staring**

**08) Asked if she really likes Pinhead or if its just friends**

**07) Asked if Chatterer was her lover **

**06) Told her Angelique wants her**

**05) Tell her skinless Frank likes her**

**04) Tell her the entire gash hates her (*cries*)**

**03) Ask if she misses her human life and human family**

**02) Say she's not a good cenobite**

**01) Tell her she's set to marry Butterball and have his kids**

"**AHHH SHIT FEMALE!" Kirsty screeched as Female grabbed her and pulled Kirsty's underware up and over her head. Kirsty managed to get it rearranged and took off running due to an extremely pissed off Female bolting off after her knives in hand. Kirsty ran as if her entire 'undead' life depended on it…and it did. "I'm gonna tear you sould avatar!" Female yelled. "Hey no fair! that's my line." Pinhead complained. "Shut the fuck up Pinhead! Suck it!" Female snarled back staring coldly at him.**

**Next chapter: annoying Chatterer**


	4. how to annoy chatterer

**How to Annoy Chatterer**

**Kirsty had somehow managed to evade an enraged Female. She decided maybe to leave the Female alone for a while until things calmed down. But Female was a vengeful type and was apt to get back at the human when she least suspected it. Right now Kirsty was on the hunt for Chatterer. The seemingly shyer centobite was off by himself. No Female around so Kirsty was free to have her fun.**

**She went up to the younger cenobite. "Hey Chatterer." Kirsty smiled. Chatterer acknowledged her. He clicked a greeting that Kirsty took as a good sign. As long as he didn't try and put fingers in her mouth it was all good. It wasn't long before she started in on poor Chatterer.**

**50) Asked when was the last time he been to the eye doctor**

**49) Asked if he needed glasses to "see"**

**48) Asked if he had a thing for Female**

**47) Told him Bound was pissed that he didn't ask her out**

**46) Said that he was being replaced.**

**45) Told him no one really likes him**

**44) Told him Angelique wants to have his baby**

**43) Told him Female didn't love him anymore**

"**Click-click-click." (*translation Shut up Kirsty.*)**

**Kirsty who was on a roll wasn't about to stop. She grinned evilly and started in yet again. 'he's blind as hell. He can't find me if I am quiet.' she thought to herself**

**42) Asked why he opened the box**

**41) Call him a 'butter face'**

**40) Ask if he is related to melted candles**

**39) Ask if he ****ever**** brushes his teeth**

**38) Ask why he drools a lot**

**37) Say that his breath smells like moldy cheese**

**36) Ask why he likes putting fingers in peoples mouths**

**35) Ask why he squeaks rather than talks**

**Chatterer stood there his head cocked to one side. He honestly didn't know what Kirsty's problem was. He was becoming slightly annoyed. 'I'm not going to let her get to me.' Chatterer thought to himself. He was not going to loose it like Pinhead and Female did.**

**34) Ask if he looked more like his mother or father**

**33) Tell him Female was carrying his child**

**32) Make fun of his wardrobe**

**31) Ask why he always hangs around Female**

**30) Tell him Butterball wants to be his lover**

**29) Tell him Butterball is carrying his child**

**28) Yell "can you hear me now?" in his earless head**

**27) Ask what the wires are around his mouth**

**26) Tell him Tiffany likes him**

**25) Tell him he's been grounded**

**24) Remove all his teeth while he's unconscious**

**Kirsty was having a grand old time laughing at poor embarrassed Chatterer. 'What a spaz.' Kirsty thought to herself with a giggle. 'This kid has serious issues.'**

**23) Tell him Angelique is his real mother and to go hug her**

**22) While he's running from pissed Angelique say it was a joke**

**21) Call him football head and offer to take him to a game**

**20) Say he looks like a wrinkled hotdog**

**21) Ask why he's red and if he's been in the sun too long**

**20) Say Tiffany's having his baby**

**19) Ask him if he smells something funky**

**18) Tell him he smells like cheese**

**Chatterer lifted his arms and took a whiff despite his nose not being there. 'Woah. She's right on that one.' Chatterer thought to himself.**

**17) Buy him toothpaste and a toothbrush tell him to use them.**

**16) Ask him if he's ever kissed anyone before**

**15) Tell him his face looks like a turd**

**14) See if he is ticklish**

**13) Not invite him to torture a soul**

**12) Have him join you in human realm then ditch him there**

**11) Ask him on a date then not show**

**Chatterer took all this in stride. He didn't really mind being "tormented" by Kirsty. (all except being chased by Angelique for hugging her and yelling Mommy, that pissed him off) he figured he could get Kirsty back at any time. He was more patient than his other two companions.**

**10) Follow him around saying 'hi' all the time**

**09) Throw marshmellows at him**

**08) Tell him Pinhead wants to promote him**

**07) Say he's taking Pinhead's place as leader. Don't tell Pinhead**

**06) Say Female craves him and wants him. Bad.**

**05) Say Angelique wants him to propose**

**04) Film him in the shower singing. Post on you tube.**

**03) Crank call him on his phone**

**02) Take away his phone**

**01) DonkeyPunch him and run**

**Kirsty found herself flying yet again headfirst into a pile of filth. Chatterer hissed angrily and stuck his foot up her butt in a hard kick digging her even deeper into the festering pile. With a final growl he stalked off. He had to redeem himself and set the record straight about the stuff said about him and see if there was any truth in what was said to him about the others. (save for Angelique; he wasn't going anywhere near her.)**

**Next Chapter: Kirsty gets brave. Or has a death wish. Angelique is in the lines for annoyance.**


	5. annoying angelique

Annoying Angelique

Kirsty unstuck herself from the filth that Chatterer had placed her in. So far she had succeeded in pissing of Pinhead, Female and Chatterer. It was rather fun being as there was nothing much to do in the Labyrinth. Now she plotted to torment the second most dangerous cenobite there. Angelique. She found the arrogant cenobite admiring herself in front of a mirror. Angelique saw Kirsty approach and narrowed her eyes. Kirsty came over confidentally and started in on the Princess.

50) Told her she was putting on weight 49) Asked if she was pregnant and who was the father 48) Assumed Butterball is the father of her child.

Without warning Angelique backfisted Kirsty who went sailing into the wall. Shut up you little curr! Angelique snarled the dislike for Kirsty evident in her voice. Kirsty just simply got to her feet and continued.

47) Told her female was WAY more prettier than her 46) Say that female was carrying Pinhead s child 45) Say that Pinhead and Female had sex in Angelique s bed 44) Say that Pinhead hates her (*cries*)  
>43) Say Butterball wants to father her children 42) Say the Toymaker kicked her ass; and he s HUMAN!<br>41) Ask her if stupidity runs in her family line 40) Ask if she would be Kirsty s buddy

Kirsty had taken off running like Leviathan was after her. Angelique was hot on her trail. If she got a hold of her she d rip her apart. I ll get you, you filthy curr! Angelique shrieked. Luckily Kirsty kept running.

39) Said that Angelique liked fat guys like De lisle 38) Said that Tiffany could kick her ass blindfolded 37) Constantly tell her that she failed to kill Merchant s bloodline 36) Tell her Pinhead wants to father a child; just not with her 35) Kiss Pinhead right in front of her and accept his proposal 34) Tell her Leviathan has grounded her for being an asshole 33) Tell her she smells like moldy cheese bits

Angelique screamed murderously at Kirsty s mention of Pinhead not wanting to be her consort and thinking ill of her. She would catch Kirsty and cut the filthy lies from her lips.

32) Say that the only chance she has at love is with Butterball 31) Say that even Butterball doesn t want her 30) Get her set up on a date with Frank 29) Slap her in the face with a piece of sausage 28) Ask how can she have relations with a cenobite pet (ewwww)  
>27) Ask where her pseudo cenobites went 26) Make up a song about her loving herself 25) Ask her to close her eyes for a kiss with Pinhead. When she does so have Butterball kiss her instead.<p>

Angelique was inches from grabbing Kirsty by the hair when Kirsty suddenly veered left causing Angelique to slam right into Butterball. Butterball was shocked but pleased. Hrrmmmm? He muttered.

24) Tell her Pinhead wants her really bad to kiss Chatterer 23) Ask when is the last time she had sex 22) Ask her if she wants to have children one day 21) Have her babysit Hell s Children 20) Tell her Merkova wants to fight her

Angelique snarled. That fucking horse faced woman can t handle me! I ll beat the shit out of her! Angelique bellowed. Off in the distance Merkova shouted back; Fat chance bitch! My Lucky Six will beat the shit out of you!

19) Ask Angelique if she s ok after being beaten by Merkova and her Gash.  
>18) Give her a hug and apologize 17) Ask if Angelique is gaining weight 16) Say her clothes don t look right on her 15) Replace her wardrobe with cheap rags 14) Say that her tests came back and she s pregnant 13) Yell Get your fucking hands off of him! for no reason<p>

Angelique rubbed the side of her head where she had been pummled by Merkova and her gang. Oh, how she HATED Kirsty. She couldn t wait to rip her apart.

12) Say that Angelique prefers women to men 11) Say tht Angelique wants a rematch with Merkova 10) Laugh as Angelique runs from Merkova 09) Play keep away with the Lament Configuration 08) Cut the strings that are hooked from Angelique s head and shoulders 07) Say the Twins want to marry her 06) Say she makes a lousy cenobite 05) Say she makes a worse mother 04) Tell her Pinhead is married to Kirsty 03) Say Kirsty is pregnant with Pinhead s child

It can t be. Kirsty can t be pregnant with Pinhead s child. Not Fair! Angelique thought to herself. (even though Kirsty wasn t pregnant with Pinhead s child)

02) Go to an exclusive party and tell Angelique all the details 01) Run and give Angelique a big hug and say she s the best friend you ever had. (*sigh dammit*)

Now how the hell was Angelique supposed to get Kirsty now that Kirsty had said that. Damn you Kirsty.

Next Chapter: Kirsty tries to annoy Butterball. Will it work? 


	6. annoying butterball

**Annoying Butterball**

**Kirsty rubbed the bruise she got for annoying Angelique. She honestly did not know why Angelique didn't do more damage than she did. She had a guess though; her guess was that someone actually said she was interested in being friends with Angelique. Or at least frenemies. Her journey next was leading her to Butterball. The fat cenobite. He should be fun.**

**50) Asked Butterball if he was gaining weight**

**49) Said he could stand to loose some pounds**

**48) Asked why he was greasy and sweaty all the time**

**47) Took his sunglasses away from him**

**46) Told him to open his "eyes"**

**45) Called him 'my little piggy'**

**Butterball just stood there looking at her curiously. "Hrummmm?" He inquired stunned that anyone would speak to him. Kirsty just stared for a moment. Usually she got some sort of negative reaction from the other cenobites. What was different with Butterball?**

**44) Told him Female wanted to make out with him ****badly.**

**43) Told him that Angelique wanted to be his girl.**

**42) Said Pinhead needed some lube for his chains**

**41) Called him a fatass**

**40) Put him on a diet**

**39) Asked him why he can't talk**

"**Hruuumm?" Butterball inquired innocently looking at her his head cocked to the side. He was grinning slightly. 'Ughhh I hope he doesn't think I'm coming onto him.' Kirsty thought with disgust. If Butterball had interest in her Kirsty would jump off the nearest ledge.**

**38) Go to an all you can eat buffet and not invite him**

**37) Call him by his true name; Laslo**

**36) Asked him if he was a pedophile**

**35) Replaced all his food with diet food**

**34) Throw a piece of chicken on the ground attached to a string and have him chase it**

**33) Don't share your candy when he asks for some**

**By now Butterball walked slowly towards Kirsty his arms outstretched for a hug. "Shiiit NO!" Kirsty backed away. Butterball stood there with a grin on his face. 'Kirsty funny girl.' Butterball thought to himself.**

**32) Call him Mr. Potato Head**

**31) Say he looks like a poo**

**30) Get him on a date with Jabba the Hutt**

**29) Say Angelique is the mother of **_**HIS**_** child**

**28) Ask when is the last time he took a shower**

**27) Say he smells like bacon fat**

**Butterball stared at Kirsty. Now Angelique liked him? He couldn't even stand that woman. He could barely be in the same room with her without some sort of argument between the two.**

**26) Say Pinhead wants to promote him to lead cenobite**

**25) Ask if he has a girlfriend and who it is**

**24) Ask if it's Chatterer**

**23) Ask him if he has a dental plan and what it is**

**22) Tell him he needs to brush his teeth**

**21) Tell him NOT to eat the toothbrush and toothpaste**

**Butterball ran his tongue over his teeth feeling them. He was getting pretty self conscious right about now. **

**20) Buy him soap and tell him how to use it**

**19) Take him to a baldness clinic**

**18) Say his clothes are too small for him**

**17) Yell in his face and ask if he heard you**

**16) Slap him and see if he jiggles like jell-o**

**15) Call him Jell-o Butt**

**Kirsty was cackling like a hen. Butterball looked like he was getting irritated. He had tolerated A LOT from Kirsty but now he was getting downright mad. If he could speak he would have told her off but all that he got out was a "Hrummmmhh!"**

**14) Ask if the only word he knows is 'Hrummmmh'**

**13) Ask how he got the slit in his belly**

**12) Ask if playing with the slit gets him "excited"**

**11) Say his breath smells like jock straps**

**10) Accuse him of eating all the cookies**

**09) Tell him to eat healthy**

**Butterball was growling now. Kirsty had grinned. It was a bit late but Butterball was getting irritated….just like Kirsty had wanted.**

**08) Tickle his belly**

**07) Replace his clothing with maternity clothing**

**06) Fix him up on a date with Bound (yeah right.)**

**05) Say Bound is the mother of his child**

**04) Ask about his one night stand with Chatterbeast**

**03) Ask him if he is a pervert like everyone says**

**02) Slap his belly**

**01) Call him Mr. Potato head reject**

"**Aieeeee!" Kirsty screamed as Butterball suddenly embraced her in hug. He released her immediately. She ran off needing to shower big time. That was the last time she would **_**ever**_

**Try and annoy Butterball. Butterball's thought: 'Hahah I got Kirsty back. Heheheh!'**


	7. annoying channard

**Annoying Dr. Channard**

**Kirsty had a doctor's appointment. Not because she was ill or needed a check up; because she was scheduled to annoy Dr. Channard. Channard was in his institute most of the time but right now he was floating along one of the corridors. Kirsty greeted the doctor cenobite and almost immediately started in on him.**

**01) Prank called his office constantly**

**02) Prank called his private number**

**03) Say that Julia was suing him for mal-practice**

**04) Threaten to sue him for mal-practice**

**05) Turn him into the board for patient abuse**

**Channard just sighed. Obviously Kirsty needed medical psychiatric help right away. Just like her old friend Tiffany.**

**06) When he does his tentacle thing cut off the ends**

**07) Replace the tentacle heads with flowers**

**08) Say that Tiffany stole one of his boxes**

**09) Ask him to see if Bound has any diseases "down below"**

**10) Tell him Butterball needs a prostate exam**

**Channard shuddered at the mere thought of examining Bound or Butterball. Bound disliked Channard intensely (she pretty much disliked everyone else in the labyrinth except for one person) and Butterball would find enjoyment out of it.**

**11) Ask why Channard was blue**

**12) Ask why he closed his eyes when he spoke to you**

**13) Ask why his teeth were all funky**

**14) Ask why his voice sounded funny**

**15) Ask why he clenched his teeth when speaking**

**Kirsty was having a blast. Channard thought she was just plain nuts. Maybe living in the Labyrinth did that to one who has been living in it too long. But Channard was loosing patience.**

**16) Ask why didn't he help Tiffany**

**17) Ask why he wanted to become a cenobite in the first place**

**18) Ask why does he recommend amputation**

**19) Where did you get all those boxes Channard?**

**20) Say when he yells it sounds like a giant panther in heat**

"**Kirsty, you seriously need help. Let me help you Kirsty." Channard tried to reason with the insane woman. Kirsty just shook her head and giggled. Then resumed her torment.**

**21) Asked if that thing on top of his head was a tumor**

**22) Asked if that thing on top of his head was a penis**

**23) Ask if its Leviathan's penis or his own penis**

**24) Ask how he likes giving Leviathan "head"**

**By now poor Channard had checked himself into his hospital. Kirsty was beyond help and downright bat shit insane as far as Channard was concerned. He wondered how he was going to handle spending an eternity within the labyrinth with an insane Kirsty Cotton.**

**Next up: Annoying Bound may not be the wisest thing to do…**


	8. annoying Bound

**Annoying Bound**

**Kirsty having driven the poor doctor crazy had left in search of her next target. She found her sitting by herself. Bound. The cenobite was quiet (although she could speak but chose not to, letting body language convey her emotions) and certainly not the friendliest one to be around. Bound was short tempered and quick to anger. (even Angelique stayed away from her) Right now Bound was thinking about the one she truly loved. Chatterer.**

**01) Speak about Chatterer in terms of endearment**

**02) Spoke poorly of Chatterer**

**03) Say that Chatterer could do better than her**

**04) Say Chatter wants to start a family; just not with Bound**

**05) Say that Chatterer isn't romantically attracted to her**

**Kirsty was so busy with her torment she didn't see Bound rise to her feet and stalk towards the young woman silently. She only noticed when Bound grabbed her by the neck and threw her against the wall momentarily stunning the human. Bound stalked off irritated.**

**06) Send a love letter to Bound with Chatterer's signature**

**07) Reveal it to be Butterball when a happy Bound runs to her "love"**

**08) Say that Chatterer is romantically involved with Trevor Gooden**

**09) Kiss Chatterer in front of Bound and propose to him**

**10) Tell Bound that Female is waaaaay prettier**

**This time Kirsty felt her arm nearly snap off. It was broken and white hot sheets of agony flared throught her body. Once again Bound stormed off. She wanted to be left alone. She never even spoke to Kirsty; she saw no point in conversing with humans..they were beneath her as far as she was concerned.**

**11) Ask if her first husband was really a psychopathic murderer**

**12) Ask if she was just as cruel or even crueler**

**13) When you get out of intensive care ask her the two above questions again**

**14) Tell her Chatterer wants to make out with her**

**15) When she goes to kiss a horrified Chatterer say it was a joke**

**This time Kirsty managed to barely escape when Bound growled and lunged forwards to her. Just what the hell was Kirsty's problem? Did she honestly **_**want**_** to piss off Bound?**

**16) Ask why Bound doesn't speak**

**17) Ask if she's ever been kissed**

**18) Ask if she wants to kiss anyone**

**19) Ask if Trevor's a good kisser**

**20) When she shrugs her shoulders reply with "you should know…you were kissing him"**

**The last comment nearly made Bound snap the human in half. She had only kissed Trevor (in human guise) because she was supposed to harvest his soul. She despised Trevor and hated the fact the asshole was now infatuated with her and wanted to be with her.**

**21) State the fact that Trevor did her last night and now she's pregnant with Trevor Gooden's child**

**22) State that you saw Chatterer kiss Female and then propose**

**23) Ask why she never smiles and why she's so mean at times**

**24) Ask her opinion on family life **

**35) Ask if she wants a family one day**

**Kirsty awoke in a world of hurt. Her legs had been broken in several places. Both arms broken and Kirsty's back was broken as well. Bound kicked her a few times for good measure than calmly walked away without a word. 'Man, Bound needs to learn to calm down. Either than or just tell Chatterer she likes him and see where it goes.' Kirsty thought to herself.**


	9. annoying The Twins

**How to Annoy The Twins**

**After recovering from her injuries she received from a very pissed off Bound, Kirsty went in search of her text target. The Twins cenobite. Both brothers were usually patrolling the corridors of the labyrinth looking for "law breakers." Kirsty thought this was one of the most unusual cenobites. Both of them were fused at the side completely. One brother's head was twisted up in a grimacing smile, the other one's was turned down in a frown. Kirsty started in.**

**01) Called security and when they came say it was a joke**

**02) Yell "law breaker" when no one is there **

**03) Ask if they were conjoined twins from birth**

**04) Ask to talk to the 'cute one' and tell the other one to leave**

**05) Ask why they don't have to wear the cenobite uniform**

**The Twins just looked at her. To them she was just merely being annoying…as long as she didn't go far with her taunts then no harm was being done.**

**06) Ask which one is the 'favorite'**

**07) Ask if they do double dates**

**08) Ask if one is angry at the other does he stalk off or is he stuck**

**09) Ask how come they absorbed that marine**

**10) Ask are they into guys**

**The Twins were starting to get irritated. They could not speak but had a telepathic link to each other and were deciding when it would be the best time to separate and teach Ms. Cotton a lesson. Kirsty being the weird girl she is paid no attention.**

**11) Invite one brother to the party but not the other**

**12) Ask if they like sharing a bed (hehe)**

**13) Have 2 people commit a crime and run in opposite ways**

**14) Go on a cruise and invite one brother**

**15) Put a girl between them; make sure one brother likes her and the other brother doesn't**

'**Dessimilation almost complete' one brother telepathically told the other one. The other one responded in kind 'agreed.' Kirsty continued her hysterical laughter jumping up and down in circles. Both brothers looked at her warily wondering what is wrong with this strange woman.**

**16) Give one brother his favorite food; make sure the other brother doesn't like said food**

**17) Ask if they share the same feeling**

**18) Ask which one is the smarter of the two**

**19) If one brother drinks get him drunk to see the reaction of the one that don't **

**20) Tell them Bound wants one of them for herself (yikes!)**

**By now both brothers have almost disengaged themselves. It was hard work. And if they didn't hurry Kirsty would be long gone before they could do anything back to her.**

**21) Say one brother thinks the other one is a jerk**

**22) Say one brother is "into" the other one**

**23) Say that Pinhead is downsizing his Gash and needs to pick one brother to get rid of**

**24) Call them a cenobite creation gone wrong**

**25) If you are married to one brother divorce him, and marry the other one**

**Both brothers were disengaged and were circling a nervous Kirsty. One was one one side the other was on the other side preventing any possible escape. But even in Kirsty's situation she could not resist in continuing her torment.**

**26) Asked how they went number 2 together**

**27) Asked how they went number 1 together**

**28) Ignore one brother and talk to the other**

**29) Get both brothers into an argument**

**30) Separate them permanently.**

**Kirsty felt an uncomfortable sensation on her whole body as the brothers' assimilation began. She wouldn't be assimilated but she would loose feeling from the neck down for quite a while. As she collapsed in confusion the brothers reassembled themselves knelt down and gently picked her up and moved her out of harms way. Even though she had irritated them they at least moved her vulnerable body out of the way while she recovered.**

'**Wow.' Kirsty thought. 'They still have decency even though they've been transformed.' Kirsty thought to herself.**

**The Twins disappeared down the corridor without a word and a glance back.**


	10. annoying Barbie

**Annoying Barbie**

**Kirsty needed a drink after what she went through. She debated on giving up her quest of pissing off the cenobites but changed her mind. None of them were really friends with her anyways although she had a feeling one of them did like her in more than just a friendship way. She just didn't know who. She sat down at the bar debating on who to go after next; her decision was made quickly when she saw who emerged from the back. Barbie.**

**01) Ask if Barbie had his liquor license**

**02) Threaten to take his license away**

**03) Ask for free drinks**

**04) Complain about the prices of his drinks**

**05) Accuse him of getting a child drunk**

**Barbie just shook his head and walked off. He had more important things to do than to deal with Kirsty. However Kirsty was far from done with him. She followed him into the back. Barbie spun around shocked. No one had ever followed him anywhere before.**

**06) Asked if the barbed wire hurt**

**07) Offer to give him a tetnus shot**

**08) Have him make drinks then change your mind**

**09) Say he gave you the wrong drink to get a free one**

**10) Get intoxicated and accuse him of misconduct**

**Misconduct? Barbie would **_**never**_** engage in any kind of sexual behavior with someone who was intoxicated. Especially a human…more specifically Kirsty Cotton. He pushed Kirsty back in warning. He wanted her away from him and away from him now. **

**11) Asked how he got his fire breath**

**12) Make him use his fire breath then call the authorities**

**13) Give him non flammable fluid to drink**

**14) Check him into AA **

**15) Ask if he is named after the Doll**

**Barbie groaned. At times he really hated his cenobitic name. Barbie. Almost everyone asked if he was named after the doll**

**Kirsty wasn't making it any easier.**

**16) Asked if he knew Malibou Beach Barbie**

**17) Say that Ken is looking for him**

**18) Tell him Stitch is interested in a LTR and is looking for him**

**19) Tell him he's lost his job being bartender**

**20) Make him pay for the damages to the wall he walked through**

**21) Turn him in for killing all those cops protecting Joey**

**22) Call him an alchaholic**

**23) Say Pinhead fired him for showing up to "work" drunk**

**24) Make him take a sobriety test**

**25) Only give him Near Beer or O'Douls non alchaholic to drink**

**Barbie had broken into a run. This Kirsty was not giving up. Kirsty had chased after him laughing wildly. He had to get away from this crazy woman. Spending an eternity here within the labyrinth didn't seem so bad…at first. But then Kirsty had to fool with the box and become a resident of the Labyrinth. He was in trouble.**

**26) Get him drunk and lay him down next to Chatterbeast**

**27) Record him acting like a fool when drunk and post it on you tube**

**that's all for now. Barbie ran off somewhere unknown. **

**Next chapter: kirsty annoys Piston head (yes its possible to annoy him)**


	11. Pissing off Pistonhead

**How to Annoy Pistonhead**

**A/N: Sorry about the wait. My mouse crapped out on me and I had to get a new one. Now I can continue along with the updates**

**Kirsty continued to wander around the labyrinth looking for her next target. Her next target was decided when she saw none other than the sex maniac Pistonhead formerly known as JP Monroe. Pistonhead turned around to see a Kirsty Cotton walking towards him with a sly grin on her pretty face. Pistonhead couldn't believe his luck.**

"**Hey baby." Pistonhead grinned walking towards her. He was hoping he'd get lucky. So far none of the resident females took him up on his offer for a wild night of romance. Nothing long term; just a booty call. 'Ughh even in his cenobite form he's still a perv.' Kirsty thought to herself. She wondered how she could upset someone as weird and twisted as Pinhead. She gave it a shot.**

**1. Asked him if he got turned on by the pistons in his head**

**2. Offered to give him Advil for his head; when he went to take it pull it back**

**3. Ask him why he has a fucked up looking head**

**4. Tell him he makes a crappy mechanic**

**5. Tell him he makes an even crappier cenobite**

**Pistonhead along with being a sex maniac had what others called "Big Ego Syndrome" and was easily offended if pushed far enough. Pistonhead looked at Kirsty warily. If this was some kind of foreplay it was in poor taste.**

**6. Tell him his business The Boiler Room went bankrupt**

**7. Say that Barbie (former employee and barteneder) took over his business and its doing 1000% better than when Pistonhead had it**

**8. Say that Dreamer is filing for child support from their last "encounter"**

**9. Tell him Dreamer wants to get back together and say it was a joke**

**10. Say he has "little man" syndrome and that a flea's penis is bigger than his**

**Pistonhead if it were possible would have turned a bright shade of red. "My penis is of good size Kirsty. Wanna see?" he asked clearly offended. If any of the women he were attracted her had heard this his reputation of being a ladies' man would be shattered.**

**11. Tell him that you don't want to see his tiny penis**

**12. Follow him around yelling "Baby Penis" over and over**

**13. Ask him if his balls dropped yet **

**14. Say he can't maintain an erection at all**

**15. Say he can't even get an erection**

**16. Say he has an angina**

**17. When he asks what an angina is state you don't know but still say he has one**

**18. Say the only pleasure he gets is by the pistons pounding in his head**

**19. Set him up on a mystery date with a hot "female" make sure this "female" is actually a guy. (preferably Butterball)**

**20. Ask if he liked the butt sex from Butterball**

**Pistonhead was pissed now. He advanced on Kirsty with deadly intent. Although he had never laid his hands on a woman in anger he was considering making an exception with Kirsty. Kirsty was unafraid. She had been broken, thrown into a dumpster, thrown into offal, sat upon by the fatass himself. All of which would have killed a normal human or seriously injured them from the velocity of which she was tossed.**

**21. Say his parents are looking for him**

**22. Tell him Leviathan ordered him to have a sex change**

**23. Tell him he's going to be casterated**

**24. Forbid him from engaging in ****ANY ****sexual activity**** (****including masterbation)**

**25. Tell him he has to maintain a long term relationship with Stitch**

**26. Grab onto his Pistons and jump onto his back yelling "bike ride!"**

**27. Take Chatterbeast's chew toy and hand it to Pistonhead. Laugh at results**

**28. Have one of Hell's Children run up to him yelling "Daddy!"**

**29. Tell him Leviathan has fired him**

**30. Say the only girl he can get to be with him is a blow up doll…and only if its been restrained.**

**Kirsty was having a hard time getting out of a small box she had been shoved into. How Pistonhead managed to get her into such a small box surprised even her. As she rebroke her bones trying to get out she couldn't help but grin. Who knew annoying the cenobites could be so fun?**

**Next up: Annoying Uncle Frank.**


	12. annoying Frank Cotton

**How to annoy Frank Cotton**

**(In this chapter Frank is just an asshole; not mean like in the movie)**

**Kirsty had removed herself from the small box that Pistonhead shoved her inside of. She rested a bit before going onto her next victim. She still had a few she wanted to torment as she saw them but right now she had her sights set up on her Uncle Frank. Frank was not a cenobite but to her it didn't matter. As far as Leviathan was concerned Frank wasn't "cenobite material." Kirsty started in on poor Frank without so much as a greeting.**

**1. Say Julia is back with Larry Cotton and that they are having a baby**

**2. Say that Larry is a ****way better**** lover than Frank**

**3. Say that Butterball is the only one attracted to Frank **

**4. Steal his money and give it to charity**

**5. Sign him up to be volunteer at a homeless shelter **

**Frank growled a warning at his niece. Out of all the people that irritated him the most Kirsty was the top one on his list. He tried to walk away and ignore this annoying woman.**

**6. Put salt and vinegar on him when he isn't wearing his skin**

**7. Take his skin and whatever spares he has and hide them**

**8. Tell him he has to marry Chatterer**

**9. Ask him why he says "come to daddy"**

**10. Use his skin as a chew toy for Chatterbeast **

**11. Ask if he enjoys wearing make up **

**12. Ask if he enjoys getting all those chains put in him by Pinhead **

"**Hey Kirsty how about you do your Uncle a favor? How about you shut the fuck up?" Frank snarled clearly irritated and in no mood for Kirsty's games. Kirsty just stuck her tongue out and did a raspberry "bplpblpblpblpblpblpbl" was her only response.**

**13. Ask why his room was filled with nasty things **

**14. Ask if he would ever go on a date with Female **

**15. Tell him he is sexually unappealing to all women **

**16. Follow him around all day and make weird noises **

**17. Jump on his lap when he manages to get a date and pretend he is your dad and say mom is looking for him **

**18. Replace his clothing with women's apparel**

**19. Cut off his penis and have a sexy woman seduce him**

**20. Remove his balls and have a sexy woman seduce him **

**Frank took off running as quickly as possible. He had heard of the others being tormented by an unstoppable Kirsty and figured there was no stopping Ms. Lunatic. Why didn't she get herself a man and settle down somewhere preferably ****far away from him?**

**21. Say you are moving in with him**

**22. Constantly remind him he can ****never**** sate his lust**

**23. Tell him the cenobites are looking for him and they are pissed!**

**24. Tell him that he needs to shower coz he smells like piss**

**25. Send his dating video to disturbed mental patients to get him a date**

**Next chapter: Pissing off Julia**


	13. how to annoy Julia Cotton

**How to annoy Julia Cotton**

**Julia Cotton, former stepmother to Kirsty Cotton sat in her chambers preening herself and making herself presentable for perhaps the 50****th**** time today. She was in a "decent" mood all things considering her current situation. She had to make due with the "grooming tools" given to her by Leviathan. It was poor quality, but hey… you take what you can get. Julia soon noticed a most unwelcome visitor in her mirror and her mood worsened immediately upon realizing who it was. The little annoying bitch Kirsty. Kirsty immediately set in on her next target.**

**1. Tell Julia that Frank found someone much prettier than her**

**2. Say that Larry is getting remarried and that Julia is ****NOT**

**Invited to the wedding or its reception**

**3. Steal all her beauty products and sell on E-Bay for cheap**

**4. Tell her Channard has gotten over her**

**5. Say that no sane man will **_**EVER**_** want her**

**6. Tell her that the only hopes she has in having a child of her **

**Own is to marry a man that has one already**

**7. Follow her around calling her "skinless Julia"**

**8. Tell her Larry is filing for divorce and wants ****EVERYTHING**

**9. Tell her Frank never wanted her**

**Kirsty said all these things with joyful malice. When she said tormenting things to the other cenobites it was all in fun. With Julia it was pure malice. Julia snarled and threw a glass bottle at Kirsty nearly nailing the young woman in the head. She hated Kirsty Cotton with an undying passion. Even when the brat was a child she hated her…pretending to "care" for the young woman back then was nauseating.**

**10. Give her a job as Kirsty's personal servant**

**11. Tell her she has to be cheerful and polite at all times**

**12. Tell her she has no monies coming to her following the deaths **

**Of Frank and Larry Cotton**

**13. Evict her from her home and send her to live with Butterball**

**14. Tell her she's not the fairest in the land**

**15. Stab her and say "its nothing personal baby"**

**16. Remind her constantly she got her ass kicked by Kirsty**

**17. Tell her she smells like rotten ass when she's skinless**

**18. Be Kirsty and annoy her**

**Julia who was normally calm and collected let out a venomus scream and lunged at Kirsty who merely stepped out of her way. With too much momentum and being unable to stop herself Julia slammed right into Pistonhead who was more than willing to "treat her like a lady"**

**Julia screamed in protest vowing to get "Kirsty for what she had done."**

***A/N: I know this chappie isn't the best…Its hard to work with Julia and find out what pisses her off. **

**Coming soon: how to annoy the wire twins **


	14. annoying the wire tiwns

**Annoying The Wire Twins**

**Kirsty had gotten bored with tormenting her former step mother. Now she had set her sights on the bizarre female twins known only as the Wire Twins. She started in on the twins right away. Unbenkownst to her thought the Wire Twins were really into kinky weird crap and both had a thing for Ms. Cotton.**

**1. Come right up to the twins and yell can you hear me**

**2. Say to both of them to open your eyes**

**3. Ask if they were related to Gene Simmons from Kiss (I think that's his name)**

**4. Start a rumor about one twin and say it was the other one that started it**

**5. Say one twin is prettier than the other one**

**6. State both are kinda pudgy and ask if they are Prego**

**7. Say that both need to go on a diet**

**8. Say a modeling agent called and they wanted ONE twin**

**9. Tie both of their ponytail things together and scare them off in different directions**

**10. Ask why the hell is their tongues so black**

**Both twins turned towards Kirsty and came at her slowly from opposite sides. Kirsty was so busy laughing her insane ass off she didn't realize that the twins were coming closer until one of them started to rub her back in a suggestive manner. "What the hell?" Kirsty started and jumped back. 'These girls are weird.' Kirsty thought to herself. But that did not stop her in her teasing.**

**11. Ask what the hell is up with their mouths**

**12. Ask if they ever considered hooking up with each other**

**13. Ask if they were biological sisters or just friends**

**14. Shave one twins head bald and blame the other twin**

**15. Take their outfits and replace them with 'outdated ones'**

**16. Give each twin glasses in which to see with**

**17. Ask why are they blind**

**18. Invite one twin to a beauty pangent and not the other**

**19. Invite both to the pagnet and declare their rival the winner**

**20. Slap one twin and when she asks why you hit her say it was her sister that wanted you to**

**Kirsty had backed herself into the wall to avoid being handled by the twins. One twin rubbed against her moaning softly while the other twin gave her cheek a lick. "You sick fuckin' bastards!" Kirsty shrieked and managed to break away. "Doesn't anything bother you guys?" Kirsty added a bit fearful. Being the plaything of the Wire Twins was not one of her deepest desires. She had her eyes on a certain someone but the Wire Twins were not that certain someone(s) she wanted. Kirsty managed to escape the amourus advances of the Wire Twins and take off running before the Twins decided that they wanted to do a little more than just kissing and cuddling with Kirsty Cotton.**

**This was the FIRST time Kirsty had ever had someone get the better of her…and hopefully it would be the last.**

**Up Next: Annoying Dreamer**


	15. annoying dreamer

**Annoying Dreamer**

** Kirsty ran down the corridors of the dark labyrinth laughing like a madwoman. She was having a grand ole time and searched for her next victim. Unfortunately this victim was Dreamer. The lovelorn cenobite was off by herself sitting around dreaming of her one true love that would truly love her. This is how Kirsty started in on poor dreamer;**

**Asked Dreamer if she wanted a cigarette and when she said yes tell her that you want one too and are looking for some.**

**Tell her that someone is very interested in her romantically and when she asks who it is call out Butterball**

**Constantly ask her about her dreams. When she goes to tell you walk away**

**Say that she smells like an ashtray **

**Ask her why she smokes out of her throat all the time**

**Take her cigarettes and hide them**

**Take her cigarettes and replace them with trick exploding cigarettes**

**Rub the top of her head and when she asks what you are doing say you are giving her head a buff and wax job**

**Ask her if she still likes Joey Sommerskill. When she says yes, tell her Joey wants to be with her.**

**Run from Joey and Dreamer when its realized Joey only cares for Dreamer as a friend**

**Tell her Pistonhead wants a second chance**

**Call Dreamer baldy all the time. **

**Tell her to wake up and get out of the dream world**

**Take her shopping and whilst out take her to a wig store**

**Paint a target on her head and take her to the human world where seagulls like to fly**

**Ask her why she likes to burn peoples' arms with cigarettes**

**Kirsty was in hysterical laughter as Dreamer stood looking at her. At first Kirsty thought Dreamer would have taken off after her but she merely walked slowly up to the laughing woman. She leaned in and planted a quick but serious kiss on her lips. Kirsty backed away in shock. "what the hell Dreamer?!" she asked stunned. Dreamer smiled. "At least you shut your blathering. You expect someone to smack you one or chase you. You didn't expect a kiss." Dreamer whispered smiling slightly.**

** Kirsty backed away. She didn't understand the cenobite females at all. First the Wire Twins, now Dreamer.**


	16. how to annoy leviathan

**How to annoy Leviathan**

Kirsty Cotton was running through the dank halls of The Labyrinth not concerned with the other cenobites going after her. She was dead, after all. And what could they really do? Kill her again and mutilate her soul? Hardly. She's had that done so many times it gets kind of droll after a while to be honest. Nonetheless, that did not stop her from annoying the most dangerous one out there. Leviathan, Lord Of The Labyrinth Himself. She found the huge diamond shaped deity spinning around and around humming to itself.

Sing 'The Dreidal Song' to Leviathan

ask Leviathan where the extra string is kept. You want to use him as a top.

imitate his humming and mimic his spinning at the same time.

knock him off of whatever ledge he is spinning on (if he is on one at the moment)

Leviathan did not reply. Rather, shot a black beam directly at Kirsty. Now being as she was a resident, something that Leviathan had forgotten for the moment she cackled maniacally. Leviathan ignored this insane resident.

Ask Leviathan if he celebrates Huanakah because he is dreidal shaped.

throw stones at the glass facets he has from time to time. Run away. Fast.

Shoot paintballs at him as he spins. Be wary if he takes out his airsoft gun and fires back. Those bullets fucking hurt!

Kirsty rubbed her arm from being pelted with airsoft pellets. Damn, those things hurt. How the hell did Leviathan get an airsoft gun anyway?!

When Leviathan has a girl over change his shape with the little mini Leviathan puzzle and make him into a square right in the middle of an intimate moment with his date.

As he fires another beam, reflect it with a mirror so it shoots right back at him. Remove yourself from impalement after he tosses you off the ledge.

Being as he is your "father" ask him if you can get a credit card. Then charge the hell out of it.

Wrap a small version of Leviathan in blankets. When he asks what it is, tell him you had a baby. Make sure you tell him in front of all his friends/minions. When he congratulates you and asks who the baby daddy reply its him. Run. Now.

Kirsty must have been unconscious for the longest time because after she awoke she felt something funny protruding from her backside. She reached back and found that she had somehow gotten the mini Leviathan shoved up her ass. She heard Leviathan chuckling. 'that'll teach her. Fucking insane ass woman!' he thought to himself. After Kirsty pulled the little thing from her ass, for some strange reason, she sniffed it. "Phew! You stink! Well, lets go say hi to daddy." She squealed happily.

After Leviathan settles down and relaxes after his therapy, spray paint him in various colors, or cover him with "I did it for the Lolz" signage.

Tell Leviathan of his new son. If he denies it press charges and make him get a paternity test.

Ask him if he gets dizzy from all that spinning

Try and make him spin in the opposite direction

Get him a book that teaches basic English

Ask him if he has boy and girl parts being as he created everything/everyone without someone of the opposite sex

Ask why he put his dick on Channard's head

Go to a kick ass party and not invite him

Shut the creation chamber on his dick if it gets too close.


End file.
